Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
