dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
