Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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