Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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