Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
