You were right. It hurts to walk today.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
