It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
you didnt know i had herpes?
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
