they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
He better not be in your backpack
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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