i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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