I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
