My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize