I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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