I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
