sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
