His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
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