I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize
