i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
