help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
