Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
