Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
