it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
