Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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