Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Text me some of your sweat
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
