Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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