I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize
