i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I intend to get homeless drunk
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Randomize
