He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
