We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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