She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
