U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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