i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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