He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
