when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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