come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
