she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
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