I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
