That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Randomize
