Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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