great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Randomize
