is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Randomize
