i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Randomize
