from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Randomize