O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
