I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
