So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
