it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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