Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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