The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize