So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
