You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
