We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
